Archive for September, 2007|Monthly archive page

In Uncategorized on September 28, 2007 at 9:08 pm


a little over a month ago, when my dog was still in the hunt, i stayed up late to watch the conclusion of the marlins – cardinals game. if memory serves, the cardinals were trailing 3 – 1 in the bottom of the eighth when armando benitez stomped to the mound and recorded two quick outs.

then the game went weird.

benitez quickly induced a weak chop to short that hanley ramirez cleanly fielded and immediately looped over the first baseman’s head. at that moment i was as elated as benitez was pissed.

after cursing ramirez, making a lewd gesture to his crotch and wondering aloud why he ignored his spring training ritual by failing to slaughter three chickens to the lady of guadalupe, benitez decided that he could throw fastballs by the bottom half of the cardinals order.

unsurprisingly, benitez was wrong. after fouling back two pitches or so molina slashed a single to the gap to pull the cardinals within a run. then after molina advanced on a hermedia error, ryan ludwick thwacked a four seamer into the visiting bullpen for the lead. at that point fredi gonzales finally walked to the mound to pull benitez and the whole infield, sans ramirez, walked to the mound to strategize.

after the inning i was so convinced that benitez would attack ramirez that i sat on the edge of my seat. according to espn’s rob neyer benitez is the best pitcher since zambrano to successfully pair severe anger issues with such a pithy iq. as you might have guessed, the cardinals went on to win the game and thus experienced a small victory in what has been a season (for fair weather fans) to forget.

i mention this simply because often when i face a relational conflict at work or am overwhelmed by the imbecility of the general populace i react a lot like benitez.* for instance, just this morning, when dealing with mind numbing inefficiency at rectangle, i felt like denouncing the social work status quo and flaming every bleeding ego within a fifteen cube radius. fortunately, instead of aggressively goring my coworkers and deemphasizing my clients’ job searches in order to start one of my own, i had the wisdom to call upon my consilieres who were more than willing to hear me out and help me strategiez a better way forward.

one of those consilieres is a former ed** of a homeless organization in the midwest. this young leader, who has been recently cited by the milwaukee journal sentinel as robert de niro’s doppelganger, recently told me that he once began a staff training by passing around a baseball to each member of his staff. after giving the staff a few moments to fondle the rawhide and fiddle with the seams, de niro’s doppelganger asked the staff what would happen if a pitcher threw nothing but high heat to every batter he faced. inevitably, the staff concluded that if all a pitcher brought was high heat he would eventually walk way too many batters and be taken yard far more often than he would like. at that, the ed reminded his staff that just like jeff “soupy” suppan relies on a wide array of pitches to achieve success, his staff needed to diversify their approaches if they wanted their clients to taste success.

so, on account of my rectangle experience and consiliere’s advice, i’m desperately trying to develop my secondary pitches. as much as i’d like to tell you otherwise, i’m learning that when it comes to healthy human interaction the old number 1 just isn’t enough.

* but not zambrano. my 37 iq puts me in a class far above the big z.
** for the laymen among you, that’s an abbreviation for executive director, not erectile dysfunction. get your heads out of the gutter.


In Uncategorized on September 21, 2007 at 2:10 am

i’m with rod on this one

along with many others, i’ve been thinking quite a bit about the protests in jena, louisiana today. i could say more about this subject, but my opinion pretty much lines up with rod dreher’s and he writes so much better than i do.

“Let me stipulate right up front: what happened to the Jena 6 was unjust. No question about it. I am grateful for the national attention to this story, and am grateful too that justice is finally being served.

But the sight of Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton leading the march there today makes me sick. These guys are both dirtbags who thrive off of exploiting racial discord.”

read more…

In Uncategorized on September 19, 2007 at 1:20 am

rock the vote

i’m probably the last person in the baseball world to hear about this, but marc ecko – some hipster i know next to nothing about – has purchased barry bonds’ 756 home run ball and is now allowing fans to determine the fate of the ball.

so log on to to vote on whether the ball should be: a) donated to the hall of fame; b) branded with a red asterisk before being donated to the hall of fame; or c) banished into space on a rocket ship.

i personally voted for option b because i think it is the most humiliating option and i think that the asterisk would encourage some idiot commentator* to construct a tortured analogy in which the brand on the baseball would be likened to the lamentable legacy of southern slavery.

so go forth and vote an then return to share your reasoning.

update! is now reporting that bonds, who has a well-documented penchant for leaving the income he receives from merchandise sales unreported and utilizing such funds to purchase homes and other amenities for his whor girlfriends, is calling marc ecko an “idiot” for spending $750,000 on the ball and doing something “stupid” with it. ecko did not respond directly to bonds’ criticism but did offer to design a shirt for bonds that reads “marc ecko paid $752,467 for my ball, and all i got was this ‘stupid’ t-shirt.”

is it just me or is this turning into one of the greatest practical jokes of all time?

* calling stephen a. smith. baseball tonight needs your opinion, stat!

In Uncategorized on September 16, 2007 at 8:21 pm

the return of the cohort

hey one and all,

after a four month hiatus boston’s emergent cohort is finally reconnecting. here are the vitals:

date: tuesday, september 25th
time: 7 p.m.
place: cambridge brewing company in kendall square (1 kendall square, cambridge, ma 02139)
purpose: generative conversation among friends

if you are an old cohort member, we’ll look forward to continuing the conversation. if you’re new to this cohort we’ll look forward to connecting with you, together considering the beauty, goodness and truth of God’s Kingdom and perhaps discussing how we can partner together to pursue Christ’s mission in this world.

if you have questions about the cohort or would simply like to drop me a line at, feel free.*

peace of Christ,


* for those of you who have already dropped a line and until now have received no response, please accept my apologies. i’ve been a bit overwhelmed by the new father bit as of late but am hoping to be a tad more responsive in the near future.

In Uncategorized on September 11, 2007 at 5:05 pm


about three months before preston was born my mother-in-law told me that after the baby was born life would become a whole lot simpler for me.

in that (brief) moment, i wondered whether she was certifiable.

but, as preston begins his fifth month of life i must confess that my mother-in-law was right. since preston entered our life i’ve realized that obsessing about my personal story is far less important, and much less fulfilling, than wholly investing myself in his story, the narrative of my marriage, the life of my community and the reconciling mission of my God.

so life has become a bit simpler. i’ll drink to that.

In Uncategorized on September 8, 2007 at 2:43 am


rod dreher over at crunchy con recently linked to this piece by amy wellborn dubruiel, a catholic blogger who i don’t know but feel like i should.

anyway, in the piece above amy provides a horrifying tour through some of the more egregious expressions of contemporary EEEvangelical* worship and suggests why such expressions lead many christians to long for liturgy and tradition.

as i read her post, i was particularly touched by the great example northeastern christian church in louisville set for my own bretheren and sisteren by foregoing worship on july 1st to host showings of evan almighty. nice.

if you take a few minutes to read the article, let me know what you think.

* in his brief introduction, rod labels these forms as “emergent.” since emergent is a generative conversation, not a worship style or a sermon series on sanctified, astroglide-anointed sex, i’m going to have to disagree with rob on that characterization. i hope that people do not start using the label emergent as a tag all of the worthless pop-art, market-driven, mega-church worship styles that most of us in the emergent conversation love to hate. that mis-characterization would be tragic.

In Uncategorized on September 6, 2007 at 1:49 am

a quick update

it’s been over twenty days since i posted, so i thought i’d s.p.e.w. a little drivel.

over the past couple of weeks i’ve been:

  • playing politics, er, i mean diversify my responsibilities at rectangle by writing grants, abstaining from inter-office sin and solidifying my position as placement king
  • investing as much time as i can in ministry at the gathering
  • continuing to learn how to love my wife like Christ loves the church
  • enjoying every minute i spend with my old/new housemates, the de franzas
  • preparing for my final seminary class which i ultimately realized i do not have the money to attend
  • walking the dizzle and her new “friend” general jackson
  • taking preston to daycare every morning, picking him up every afternoon and loving every minute of it
  • looking forward to reconnecting with friends from the second city
  • laughing my arse off at this post on this site
  • wondering why the cardinals are outperforming their pythagorean record by nine games
  • starting to get excited about halloween…
  • but resisting the the temptation to attend the rectangle halloween party as a black-faced, pixie stick sniffin’, pin stripe sportin’ dr. k

that’s all for now. expect the valiant return of somewhat reasonable and meaningful posts in the not too distant future.

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